PSYCHOLOGY OF GOSSIP
Traditionally, all gossips are women; but men are often guilty of the same offense. They call it "judging."
Our Divine Lord, in speaking of gossips, said, "do not judge others, or you yourselves will be judged." His admonition not to "judge" demands that we make no wicked evaluations, do not look for the worst in others. God alone sees one neighbor's heart; we see only his face.
In England, the judges wear wigs in court, to show that it is the LAW which is passing judgment, and not their own personal views. This is done in recognition of the truth all men suspect - that there is something impudent in allowing even the wisest among us to engage in pigeonholing our friends or cataloging our enemies.
When we judge others, we also judge ourselves. Our Lord asked us not to judge, lest we be judged; and sometimes the judgment we make of others is in itself a condemnation of our own faults.
Jealousy can be a tribute paid by mediocrity to genius: the jealous person then admits the superiority of his rival, but since he cannot reach the level himself, he drags the other down to his. Other forms of criticisms are equally revealing of the One who criticizes.
Our Lord told us that the gossip's faults are often greater than those he criticizes in his neighbor. "How is it that thou canst see the speck of dust which is in thy neighbor's eye, and are not aware of the beam that is in thy own? By what right wilt thou say to thy brother, brother let me get rid thy eye of that speck, when thou canst not see the beam that is in thy own? Take the beam out of thy own eye first, and so thou have a clear sight to rid thy brother's of the speck."
The "speck" was only a bit of chaff, a splinter of wood. But the beam wa a sizable piece of wood.
To see ourselves up as worthy of judging others is already to see ourselves as their superiors, to be guilty of sin of pride, the huge "beam" that obscure our vision.
We cannot gossip without either overrating ourselves or underrating our neighbor... and frequently we do both. For the gossip is prone to project unto another the fault he suspects within himself.
The incurable gossip flies into a rage when he hears that he, in turn, has been talked about behind his back.
Traditionally, all gossips are women; but men are often guilty of the same offense. They call it "judging."
Our Divine Lord, in speaking of gossips, said, "do not judge others, or you yourselves will be judged." His admonition not to "judge" demands that we make no wicked evaluations, do not look for the worst in others. God alone sees one neighbor's heart; we see only his face.
In England, the judges wear wigs in court, to show that it is the LAW which is passing judgment, and not their own personal views. This is done in recognition of the truth all men suspect - that there is something impudent in allowing even the wisest among us to engage in pigeonholing our friends or cataloging our enemies.
When we judge others, we also judge ourselves. Our Lord asked us not to judge, lest we be judged; and sometimes the judgment we make of others is in itself a condemnation of our own faults.
Jealousy can be a tribute paid by mediocrity to genius: the jealous person then admits the superiority of his rival, but since he cannot reach the level himself, he drags the other down to his. Other forms of criticisms are equally revealing of the One who criticizes.
Our Lord told us that the gossip's faults are often greater than those he criticizes in his neighbor. "How is it that thou canst see the speck of dust which is in thy neighbor's eye, and are not aware of the beam that is in thy own? By what right wilt thou say to thy brother, brother let me get rid thy eye of that speck, when thou canst not see the beam that is in thy own? Take the beam out of thy own eye first, and so thou have a clear sight to rid thy brother's of the speck."
The "speck" was only a bit of chaff, a splinter of wood. But the beam wa a sizable piece of wood.
To see ourselves up as worthy of judging others is already to see ourselves as their superiors, to be guilty of sin of pride, the huge "beam" that obscure our vision.
We cannot gossip without either overrating ourselves or underrating our neighbor... and frequently we do both. For the gossip is prone to project unto another the fault he suspects within himself.
The incurable gossip flies into a rage when he hears that he, in turn, has been talked about behind his back.
Our Lord asked the gossips to examine their own rights to condemn the faults of others: "He who is without sin among you, let him cast the first stone."
The implication is clear: Innocence alone has the right to condemn. But innocence will always wish to take on the guilt of others, to atone for his failings as if they were his own. Love recognizes the sin, but love also dies for it.
"He who loves his brother abides in light...
But he who hates his brother is in darkness."
God offers a beautiful reward to those who do not judge: "they themselves shall not be judged, when they are brought before the heavenly court.
God's judgment is sure to be more merciful than any that we make.
Men and women are not wise enough or innocent enough to judge each other. The only decision we can rightly make about our brother who is doing wrong is to admit and say: "we will leave him to God."
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